{while we wait}

last week we were fairly certain we would be holding "the baby brother" in our arms right now...but instead we are still waiting. the plan was induction due to his size, but we went in monday morning and found that the hospital's induction policy on induction for larger than gestational age babies had recently changed. we were disappointed at first...for obvious reasons...my discomfort, thinking we were in the "home stretch", and having an insurance company dictate what was best rather than the doctor who sees me regularly. but, honestly my outlook is much better right now. ultimately i didn't want to be induced...i'd much rather go "on my own"...and seriously, God is in control, no matter how big (or small...) this baby boy ends up being...and no matter when he decides to arrive...or how he arrives.

we thought we were "done" because we needed to get this baby out, but in reality i think what mike and i needed more than anything was the chance to take a break...to step back and simply enjoy being together. this has been a long and cooped up winter...more so than i remember a winter being in quite sometime. we've had date nights, but our date night schedule has been interrupted quite a bit...and honestly, dates have sort of seemed "crammed" into a short time frame...a quick dinner, picking up tired kiddos from our swap and then having to get them and ourselves home and in bed...etc. (don't get me wrong...those kind of dates are much, much better than nothing at all). but monday (which also just so happened to be valentine's day) was probably the best gift we've been given in quite some time.

mike went to my appt with me in the morning...the big girls had school and my sweet friend jill offered to watch jillian for us indefinitely (since we weren't sure whether we might end up at the hospital immediately after the appt). after the appt mike decided to take the rest of the day off so we could simply enjoy some time together (perhaps also because neither of us had slept well at all the night before). after i caught a brief nap we headed to one of our favorite restaurants for a leisurely (and tasty) lunch...and we actually did a fabulous job of avoiding talk of baby, parenting, planning, schedules, etc. (not that they are bad things...i think we just needed something different)...and then we enjoyed several non-necessity errands together on a gorgeously sunny monday afternoon....holding hands, laughing, chatting, popping by sonic for dessert milkshakes. it was fabulous, just what we needed...the chance to reconnect and simply enjoy each other...without our beautiful and delightful but noisy and high-maintenance kiddos in the background. then he headed up to get the girls from school and jilly from jills...and i headed over to the gym to take a nice slow stroll on the treadmill...we may not be talking induction, but i am still eagerly anticipating this little man's appearance...and moving surely can't hurt. :)

and, really, if we are going to be in the midst of the "waiting" game...we couldn't ask for better weather...seriously. last week it was below zero...today it is 60 and delightfully sunny...kind of an oddity to be able to walk outside in a t-shirt but still see big piles of snow along the edge of the street and a smooth layer of snow still on much of my backyard. the girls and i went out this morning for a few errands...and we might have walked up and down EVERY aisle of target, aldi and kroger...then we came home and took a nice walk around the neighborhood....a nice slow walk...because, seriously, i am not moving very fast these days...it is a slow waddle. after all, this baby is big, and he is LOW...i probably look a bit comical quite honestly. :)

and so we wait...ready and eager but also doing a much better job of trusting the One who is really in control as opposed to our own plans or agendas. (and reminding ourselves of that over and over and over again as we forget or get impatient.) for those who are curious...yes i am having contractions quite frequently...i am progressing (something that has never before happened until i was hours from meeting a baby)...and i am already starting to think that boys truly are trouble. (just kidding...kind of....he he). i am learning just how much one can "wing it" for dinner...and end up with a decently healthy meal that everyone eats without complaining...something that often doesn't happen when i plan and spend lots of prep time in the kitchen. i am enjoying extra snuggles with jilly...relishing them...as i consider the bittersweet realization that in just a few more days i won't have nearly as much time to rock and snuggle and hold her. i am laundering and cleaning up and constantly trying to keep myself and the house "ready"...just in case. i am knitting...seriously in a 48 hour period i knit two more earflap hats (one a gift for a new baby girl) and another boy one...mike laughs that this baby boy is going to have the most stylishly covered head ever...and that it better stay cold awhile longer (not really!). i am enjoying playing a new game with the girls...one we picked up while we were out monday at the recommendation of a friend (s'match).

as evidenced by this post, i have not been taking pictures. the camera is tucked away in the hospital bag, and i fear that if i take it out i'll inevitably forget to put it back in.

...and that, friends, is just a snatch of what we have been up to while we wait....

...and for the record, i am fairly close to the longest i've ever "lasted" in pregnancy...i can't remember exactly how early elizabeth was, but i have already surpassed kate and jillian.